Having to go back to work after your baby is born is one of the hardest things for a working mom. Not only have you been spending 100% of your time (or at least pretty close to it with that cute, sweet smelling, wriggly little one), but you are disconnected from work and what is going on at work. Finding a daycare or babysitter or nanny that you are comfortable with can make all of the differnce in the world (although, not the first week). It can be really hard to being a working mom and knowing that your children spend their day in the care of someone else. Choosing that care is a very hard decision to make.
When we started our search, we visited numerous centers and at home care providers. Someone once told me, you just know when you find the right one. We didn't find the right one when my son was first born. In fact, he stayed home with my husband, while he worked from home for the first few months after I went back to work. I had a friend that would babysit if my husband had to travel or had a big conference call. Then, one day, he got stuck on the road and my friend wasn't available to watch my son. We knew then, that although it was nice to have my son at home, it wasn't going to be a good long-term solution.
One of my co-workers recommended a daycare and I went to check it out. I liked it. I will be the first to admit that on my son's first day of care, I drove up there on my lunch hour to see him. He was sleeping and that made me sad, because I just wanted to hold him with the 15 minutes I had to visit. He woke up shortly after I arrived (I didn't do it) and I picked him up and sat on the floor in the middle of the play area and just rocked him. They must have thought I was some sort of a lunatic. It all worked out, the next day I was happy with just a phone call to check on him. With time I adapted and as I got to know the care providers in each room as well as the director, I became increasingly comfortable. My son went there and now my daughter does.
The other day, I was dropping off my daughter at daycare. She has a "tradition" where after we get to school, she has to get a sticker from the director. As we were walking to the office, another mom was leaving and made a comment about how hard it must be to be around so many kids all day. I made a remark that they probably make it through no matter how mad or crazy it gets, just knowing that eventually the kids are all going to go home. In response, the director said, "I think of them all as my grandkids, I love them, spoil them and send them home."
Right there says it all. That is why I really like my daycare. I really love the care my kids have received there. Part of it is that feeling that kid is special to them and that they truly care about my child and are glad to see them. I think that the Director embodies this and it shows through her staff. (It probably also helps that her grandkids are actually students at the school too.)
Being a working mom is hard, knowing my kids are in good, loving hands while I am at work makes it a little easier.
To see what works for others, check out Works For Me Wednesday at We Are THAT Family.
Sorry you have to work. I would do all you can to live on one income instead - it is worth any sacrifice to be home with your children! We make it work with 5 children and hubby's income under $29,000/year, so don't say it isn't possible.
ReplyDeleteJust stopping by from WFMW to check out your blog. It's pretty spiffy. :) And you have some great articles. I enjoyed reading the couple I looked at. You have officially gotten yourself another daily reader :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for havin' me and hope to see you over at my bloggy. Have a great week.
Aw, it's a very reassuring feeling to know that your kids are with someone you can trust and who will love them.
ReplyDeleteWe did the day care thing and you're right it's important to find one that's trustworthy.
ReplyDeleteIt's true, when it's "right", you know it! We used the same daycare/preschool for both our kids, for over twelve years between them. It was truly like leaving my kids w/ their grandparents. It was a small facility and we were all, parents and staff, like family. The director would attend school programs for grandparents for my daughter, when her own grandmother couldn't be there. Tristan, don't be sorry for all of us who "have to work". If it's His plan, it will be a blessing!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for posting this to WFMW! I am an employed mother who reads stuff online during my lunch break at work, and much as I love the useful tips from WFMW, I feel a little like I don't belong because so many of the posters are SAHMs and some have quite an attitude about it being the best and only way (like Tristan). We mothers have more in common than not, and homemaking tips are as useful to someone who's making her home in the 6 hours a day she's awake there as to someone who's home all day.
ReplyDeleteI do want to mention: I try to say "employed mom" instead of "working mom" because I know that a mom who is with her kids all day IS WORKING! And I know how hurt I feel when someone refers to a SAHM as a "full-time mom." I am my child's mother all the time, and I never stop knowing it, and neither does he!
I'm so glad you found such a wonderful daycare!
He woke up shortly after I arrived (I didn't do it) and I picked him up and sat on the floor in the middle of the play area and just rocked him. They must have thought I was some sort of a lunatic.
You know, what I think is crazy is that anyone thinks that's crazy!! Why wouldn't a parent, on the first day her child is in a new place, be eager to reconnect with him? I think it's weird that some parents are able to walk in, set down their child, and immediately walk out without even saying goodbye! My kid would never stand for that, even if I could. :-)